Monday 23 January 2012

Who we are

I remember as a child I wanted to be called Jessica. And so, practicing writing my name, I started to write Jessica.

Jessica
Jessica
Jessica

Maybe, if I wrote it enough times, I would actually become Jessica and lose my Jennifer identity?! Unfortunately, my birth name kind of stuck.

As a teen, I recall my mum criticising/mocking me for not knowing who I was. My style changed so often. I didn't know if I was any of the labels kids were given then. I didn't really know my preferences. I guess my main influences have always been my friends. I see that I've been highly influenced. And it doesn't end in my past. Now, as the person I've grown into, I see that I've been moulded by a lifestyle/environment/choices influenced by others. But who am I beneath all this?

Beneath all the external influence what is it that I am? Who is Jennifer? Maybe I'm different to everyone who comes into contact with me? Maybe I'm different even to me? Maybe this internal narrator changes too!

So is it when you take away all this external/internal shit, we're all just the same chemical compounds? No me, you, I. Only we.

That would have been easier name to practice.

We
We
We

But maybe a bit WEird.

Saturday 21 January 2012

A Flame

A little bit of anger,
The fuel for the fire.
A frustration,
A spark.
Then a flame,
The fire crackles.
Things get going,
Everything heats up.
The fire glows.
Energetic and strong.

Wednesday 18 January 2012

The realising moments.

There are moments,
Sometimes longer than moments.
An evening.
A morning.
A time. Any time.
When you make a big realisation.
Some birth of thought or reason.
They can be scary.
And joyful.
We change.
We renew.
We grow.
Like children, we transpire.
Everyday someone new.