Blue Sky Ideas

pedestal |ˈpɛdɪst(ə)l|
noun
the base or support on which a statue, obelisk, or column is mounted.
• figurative a position in which one is greatly or uncritically admired : the heroes they have created and placed on pedestals.
• each of the two supports of a kneehole desk or table, typically containing drawers.
• the supporting column or base of a washbasin or toilet bowl.

I once took this word apart searching for it's meaning...I knew the same then. But I didn't really understand.

Here it is. A figurative position. An idealistic one. A blue sky idea...usually of a person.

I have known for a while that I have a tendency to put people of pedestals. I put them high in my regard and admire them. You shiny, brilliant, super human being. You are amazing. I think it's all part of my open-heartedness and innate wanting to see the very best in people. Undoubtedly, in the end said person shocks me and does/says something or just generally hurts my feelings and I see something darker than I ever imagined could be true.

I was a bit silly to put people on pedestals in the first place. Of course everyone has their good stuff but amongst that there is a bit of shit...and a history. Ooooh and there's motivation for behaviour. And that changes too. There's also everything we do that we don't mean, too. The times when we don't think. Man, I can think a dozen off the top of my head - why did i say that, contact that person, lose my temper, do that weird thing?! No point stressing over it now, it's done. Hopefully, we can understand we all make mistakes. And sometimes this is the only way we learn, no?

People I've put on pedestals have included friends, parents, men I've not known so well but I've idolized and fantasized about their perfection and teachers. I remember in high school, I admired my English teacher for her quirkiness, her unpredictability and charm. In school, as a teacher myself, the students can astonish me when a child I think I know displays some out of character behaviour. Suddenly, that child is different to how I thought. In my love life, I've given hours, months, years of my life(!) adoring...

What I value most now in people is honesty. No more rating people above the rest but I do admire honest, true...and unmotivated people. People who just enjoy me for me and life for the basic fundamentals, the simple things.

I wasted a lot of energy putting people of pedestals. Now I see how wrong I was. We're all super and in the end we all want the same thing: to feel loved and secure.